``I must give him his due. He has considerably cretinized me.'' Lautréamont

Pics click to enlarge.

Monday, November 28, 2005

Feingold: U.S. Due for 'Cheesehead' Prez

or we could get an asshole

A cheesehead is a native or resident of Wisconsin, a leading dairy state. The term also refers to the yellow "cheese" wedges worn on the heads of Green Bay Packers football fans.

Global Work Force Helps Fed on Inflation

true but bad analysis

the fed can stop inflation with or without global workers by doing its job of adjusting the money supply

it avoids crippling the economy though if there are global workers willing to take dollars at full value

the real story is that the dollar does not fall against foreign currencies

if that happened, the same price rise that they claim is avoided, would happen

leading to the same necessity of tightening the screws to prevent inflation

Adding all those workers to the global economy has made the Federal Reserve's inflation-fighting job easier by increasing competition. That has helped hold down labor costs _ the biggest single expense for employers _ and, as a result, prices.

Two Congressmen Hurt in Iraq Vehicle Flip

good news would be fatalities

BAGHDAD, Iraq -- A military vehicle carrying three congressmen overturned on the way to the Baghdad airport, injuring two of them, the U.S. Embassy said Sunday.

Katrina Victim Finally Gets Proper Burial

that's a car victim, not a katrina victim

look both ways before crossing the street

the real news is that there were cars in new orleans

Smith, 66, was struck by a car as she made her way to a grocery in New Orleans after the hurricane hit. Her common-law husband, C.N. Keene, placed a bedspread over her body. Someone later spray painted the words, "Here lies Vera. God help us" on the sheet, and a man built a short wall of bricks around her body.

Tropical Storm Delta Gains Strength

good news and bad news

MIAMI -- Tropical Storm Delta gained strength in the central Atlantic on Sunday but was expected to weaken before reaching the Canary Islands, forecasters said.

Chicago Man Accused of Kidnap for Ritual


Police found the girl unharmed at Rodriguez's home, and they arrested Rodriguez when he returned with candles and incense.

2nd Time Reporter to Testify in Leak Case

not nice to fool mother nature

WASHINGTON -- A second Time magazine reporter has agreed to cooperate in the CIA leak case and will testify about her discussions with Karl Rove's attorney, a sign that prosecutors are still exploring charges against the White House aide.

Blizzards, Accidents Slow Holiday Travel

the time to tickle a lizard
is before or right after a blizzard

Theodore Roethke

apparently avalanches didn't figure in, nor wildfires

DENVER -- The trip home after Thanksgiving was slow going for many travelers Sunday as blizzard conditions wreaked havoc from Colorado to the Midwest.

Ariz. Van Crash Kills Two, Injures Five

the real news is that it involved neither mexicans nor church groups

like a tornado missing a trailer park

PHOENIX -- A van carrying a magazine sales crew on a trip to the Grand Canyon overturned on a busy interstate north of Phoenix Sunday, killing two people and critically injuring five others, authorities said.

Man Accused of Killing 4 Family Members

he may have snapped

it happens all the time

MYAKKA CITY, Fla. -- A 20-year-old man was arrested Sunday in the slayings of his parents, younger brother and elderly grandmother, whose bodies were found bludgeoned to death in the family home, authorities said.

One Killed As Tornadoes Rake Arkansas

3,000 homes without dogs under the porch, another statistic

At least 7,500 homes were without power across Arkansas, Entergy spokesman James Thompson said.

Man, Pregnant Woman Die in Calif. Bus Flip

``woman's son, pregnant woman die'' would get even more women

``tree prevents bus plunge'' would get environmentalists

``crash photos page four'' would get men

SANTA MARIA, Calif. -- A Greyhound bus drifted off a freeway, rolled and then slid at least 100 yards on its side before hitting a tree Sunday, killing a pregnant woman and another passenger, authorities said.

U.S. Farmers Use Pesticide Despite Treaty

it's a mistake to negotiate with insects

WATSONVILLE, Calif. -- Shoppers rifle through store shelves brimming with succulent tomatoes and plump strawberries, hoping to enjoy one last round of fresh fruit before the Western growing season ends. There is no hint of a dark side to the blaze of red.

Inner Cities Continue to Hemorrhage Jobs

laws against robbery would help too

But, Sullivan said, many communities could do more to remove local barriers to development, such as cumbersome regulations.

Comeback Hard for New Orleans' Restaurants

an everybody-sad story

with esoteric reference to overpriced menu items

then there's PC, none of wm. kerrigan's proposed truck driver line, ``how long have you been a server, honey?''

These days, instead of serving up shrimp remoulade and trout meuniere, owners are installing new coolers, fixing roofs and trying to replace wait staffs and cooks.

Sunday, November 27, 2005

Seattle Monorail Trains Clip Each Other

mile high reporter reports family tragedy, the women's angle on any mishap

SEATTLE -- John Gahagan was riding the monorail with his family when the sliding door was ripped off of their train car, breaking a window and showering his two children in glass.

The train had clipped the monorail's only other train on a curve in the tracks Sunday evening, forcing the evacuation of 84 passengers from the mile-high, 43-year-old elevated line between downtown and the Seattle Center.

Believers Flock to 'Crying' Virgin Mary

the horoscope audience is big

Since then, Truong said he has been at the church day and night, so emotional he can't even work. He believes the tears are a sign.

"There's a big event in the future _ earthquake, flood, a disease," Truong said. "We're very sad."

Friday, November 25, 2005

Katrina Survivors More Thankful Than Ever

what crime gets a reporter assigned to this story

reporter : for heaven's sake, do i have to write this glop?

editor : i'm afraid you do

publisher : this is what we call women's material, and women's eyeballs are what we sell.

NEW ORLEANS -- With her apron on, Nelle Hill looked the part of the Thanksgiving Day cook, but with no power, no refrigerator and few ingredients, all she could come up with were grilled cheese sandwiches with bacon.

Sheehan Back in Texas for War Protest

just-add-water story ingredients

CRAWFORD, Texas -- The fallen soldier's mother whose August vigil near President Bush's ranch reinvigorated the anti-war movement returned to Texas to resume her protest Thursday as the president celebrated Thanksgiving a few miles away.

Traffic Trapped Cars on Ill. Train Tracks

meanwhile back at the railroad , a position is staked out

i'd have gone with the omlette and broken eggs position myself.

it has the advantage of being true.

A Metra spokesman said the vehicles shouldn't have been in the train's path in the first place. A large sign above the tracks reads: "Long crossing. Do not stop on the tracks."

"It's right above the gate" said Metra spokesman Patrick Waldron. "If you followed that sign you wouldn't have been on the tracks."

Traffic Trapped Cars on Ill. Train Tracks

NTSB thinking out loud

"The cars were in a place they shouldn't have been at the time," Rosenker said. He said the train hit them because they had nowhere to go.

Alito Often Defers to Religious Groups

kindergartner browbeaten into unlikely thanks

Hausknecht cites, for instance, Alito opinions that allowed Child Evangelism Fellowship to provide information on after-school meetings on the same terms as secular groups, and that saw violation of a kindergartner's rights when a school removed his Thanksgiving poster that was thankful for Jesus.

Sisters 'Fine' After Parade Accident

$100,000 penthouse magazine offer made

NEW YORK -- The two sisters injured because of an unwieldy giant balloon in Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade are "doing just fine," and the family doesn't plan to sue over the incident, their father said.

Thanksgiving 2005 Tempered by War, Storms

a ``who-reads-this-crap'' lede

women, that's who

MESQUITE, Texas -- Ricky Bridges stared in disbelief at his brother's dining room on Thanksgiving Day. He wasn't just awed by the homemade desserts placed on a card table that was fast running out of space for food.

Philippines Officers' Club Moves to Fla.

alcohol-free, i'd imagine

It'd be easy to think the Cubi Bar was back at its home base in the Philippines. But this officers' club that served decades of squadrons is now at home serving military personnel and visitors at the Pensacola Naval Air Station.

French Ties to La. Strengthen After Storms

official language of dysfunctional welfare-state the world over

"Even among those who don't really comprehend and have not supported the ties between France and Louisiana, it seems to be understood, if only at a subconscious level, that Louisiana's uniqueness is its Frenchness and its ties to the Francophone world," said Warren Perrin, president of the Council for Development of French in Louisiana.

Ill. Lawmaker Keeps in Touch With Voters

that'll work

The freshman Democrat, who unseated 35-year Republican Rep. Phil Crane last year by depicting him as out of touch with voters, employs a rarely used method to make sure she remains in touch: automated phone calls.

Study: More CO2 Now Than Last 650K Years

press release is an important part of science today

funding and prestige are on the line

our understanding has been improved so many times that you wonder about the previous press release about improved understanding

it must have been really bad understanding once

yet there was a crisis even then, the same crisis.

why? because funding is the entire point

improved understanding is what brings money

so improved understanding is what you get.

peer review worked, when it used to work, by curiosity.

some old fart is actually interested in this or that result, and doubts it, or sees a problem with it, and looks into it.

no committee is involved

no funding

just curiosity.

which is lacking today entirely ; everything refers to previous committees and consensus.

you get these referrals precisely because they cut out curiosity.

nobody can be interested in it.

there's nothing to be curious about.

functioning peer review is killed entirely.

so you get what you always get with social organizations

the organization always perpetuates itself.

intra-system goals come first.

hence press releases.

The study by the European Project for Ice Coring in Antarctica, published Friday in the journal Science, promises to spur "dramatically improved understanding" of climate change, said geosciences specialist Edward Brook of Oregon State University.

N.M. Gov Admits He Wasn't Baseball Pick

A ``whom of respect'' should be used when referring to dead people

He insisted his name appeared on "a draft list of some kind" created by the Los Angeles Dodgers and Pittsburgh Pirates. He named team scouts, whom he said told him that he "would or could" be drafted. The scouts have since died.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Pardoned Turkey Is Going to Disneyland

traditional AP holiday apostrophe

After the reprieve on the White House lawn, the turkey and it's alternate will be given a police escort to a Washington-area airport.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Democrat Calls Bush Fiscal Policy Reckless

press release misunderstanding suspected

WASHINGTON -- Calling the Bush administration's fiscal policies reckless and broken, Rep. Dennis Cardoza, D-Calif., urged the federal government on Saturday to rein in spending.

Lawmakers Face Difficult Budget Talks

moderates against oil exploration stand united

For starters, the budget plan passed only after GOP leaders jettisoned a contentious plan to allow oil exploration in an Alaskan wilderness area. By doing so, they sidestepped a threat by about two dozen moderates to defeat the budget measure over that issue alone.

Iraq Pullout Rejected in Rancorous Vote

everybody pretty much agreed not to pull out, would be the title

WASHINGTON -- The Republican-controlled House spurned calls for an immediate pullout of troops from Iraq in a vote hastily arranged by the GOP that Democrats vociferously denounced as politically motivated.

Calif. Wildfire Is 60 Percent Contained

in the spring they do wildflower stories and nobody notices

weed pandemic looms

VENTURA, Calif. -- Aided by an ocean breeze, firefighters on Saturday began to get the upper hand on a 3,700-acre wildfire burning in the steep hills above this picturesque oceanfront city.

One Killed As Wis. Hunting Season Opens

not to mention inter-species tensions

a tense hunting season opening story

no hunters outside enjoying themselves in this story

BLACK EARTH, Wis. -- A hunter was fatally shot by a colleague, and a juvenile accidentally shot himself Saturday as Wisconsin's deer hunting season opened amid racial tensions stemming from last year's deadly attack on a group of hunters.

Jewish Leader Blasts 'Religious Right'

another soul saved

HOUSTON -- The leader of the largest branch of American Judaism blasted conservative religious activists in a speech Saturday, calling them "zealots" who claim a "monopoly on God" while promoting anti-gay policies akin to Adolf Hitler's.

Past Yields Few Clues for Predicting Flu

it's worse than we thought! a nobody-knows news emergency, good for many story cycles.

look for ``looms'' a lot.

"My crystal ball doesn't allow me to answer that," said Dr. Frederick Hayden, a University of Virginia flu expert.

Pa. Teen Attends Slain Parents' Funeral

if there's a white ribbon on your mailbox, the tooth fairy passes you by.

everything has significance in soap opera.

the pathetic fallacy, as it's aptly named.

you didn't see romeo and juliet in any chapel honoring their parents' memory in the old days when soap opera was decent literature.

LITITZ, Pa. -- Kara Borden sat with her four siblings in the chapel of Lancaster Bible College for her parents' funeral on Saturday. On the Bordens' street, white ribbons were affixed to mailboxes to honor their memory.

32 U.S. Students Chosen As Rhodes Scholars

it's sort of like going into journalism

Among the winners was Elizabeth W. Mayne, 23, a senior at Stanford University majoring in biology with a focus in biochemistry and biophysics.

Besides studying cell cycle regulation, Mayne has spent time setting up workshops on Shakespeare for underprivileged students in the San Francisco Bay area.

"I was really stunned," the Denver native said after learning she had been chosen. "It was such a tremendously qualified and amazing group of people, so I was really just honored to meet them."

Mayne said she plans to study physiology at Oxford. She said she then plans to pursue a doctorate and medical degree and "hopefully contribute to the cure of diseases."

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Rising Sea Levels Threaten New Jersey - Study

tone-deaf press release

even people in New Jersey think : good

PHILADELPHIA (Reuters) - Rising sea levels caused by global warming could shrink New Jersey by up to 3 percent in the next 100 years, U.S. scientists warned on Wednesday.

Tornadoes Barrel Across Midwest, Southeast

worst thing you can do

Brenda Magee, who lives in Paris, was just arriving at work at a furniture factory when the storm system hit.

New Orleans Has First Post-Katrina Slaying

return to normalcy

NEW ORLEANS -- A woman was stabbed to death in what police say is the first slaying in the city since Hurricane Katrina.

Teen Returns to Pa. to Face Murder Charges

a romeo and juliet story

He is suspected of shooting Kara's parents, both 50, in their Lititz home early Sunday after an argument over the teens' relationship.

Senate to Take Up Pension Plans' Future

how about don't drive the company you work for into bankruptcy with pension demands no matter what the union tells you

WASHINGTON -- The Senate faces far-reaching legislation to ensure the future viability of company-based pension plans after hearing that the agency charged with insuring those benefits is carrying a $22.8 billion deficit.

Ex-Rep. Seeks to Reclaim Indiana Seat

unable to find job

"The call to public service is stronger than the politics of fear," Hill said as he announced his campaign Tuesday at Bloomington City Hall. "I'm going to take back this seat in the 9th District."

Post's Woodward Testifies in CIA Leak

just six degrees of separation from nixon news

WASHINGTON -- Washington Post editor Bob Woodward testified that a senior Bush administration official told him about CIA operative Valerie Plame about a month before her identity was publicly exposed, the Post acknowledged Wednesday.

Top Senate Democrat Concerned About Alito

top senate democrat is like black leader : clowns and buffoons

yet they take their press releases

WASHINGTON -- Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid on Wednesday said he has "significant concerns" about Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito, calling President Bush's latest choice one of the most conservative judges in the United States.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Grizzlies Near Yellowstone May Lose Status

honor killings. grizzly society is like arab culture.

WASHINGTON -- Hunters eventually could be allowed to kill grizzly bears in three states if the government is successful in removing federal protections.

Puget Sound Orcas to Be on Endangered List

no more orcas in chicken gumbo soup

SEATTLE -- In a victory for environmentalists, the federal government listed Puget Sound's killer whales as an endangered species Tuesday, giving the animals the highest protection available under the law.

Suspected Va. 'Cell Phone Bandit' Arrested

confusion of suspect and robber

Security cameras filmed the suspect walking up to tellers and handing them a note demanding cash _ all while appearing to be chatting on her cell phone.

Search Continues for Escaped Iowa Convicts

there actually is no search but the template is that there is a search and it's ongoing, like when you misplace your keys

it's as if you put your keys on a list of things missing and called it searching

IOWA CITY, Iowa -- Authorities searched on Tuesday for two convicted murderers who escaped from the Iowa State Penitentary by using a homemade grappling hook to scale an unguarded section of the prison's limestone walls.

Mont. Holds First Bison Hunt in 15 Years

reporter buys a buffalo in a poke

GARDINER, Mont. -- Montana's first bison hunt in 15 years opened at sunrise Tuesday, with a 17-year-old boy bagging the first buffalo within 90 minutes.

FEMA to Stop Funding Hotel Rooms Dec. 1

free money attracts free money recipients

WASHINGTON -- FEMA will stop paying for hotel rooms for most evacuees of hurricanes Katrina and Rita on Dec. 1, officials said Tuesday as the agency pushed victims to find more stable housing.

'Promise Broken': N.Y. to Lose 9/11 Aid

it's for the children. try that line.

WASHINGTON -- Congressional budget negotiators have decided to take back $125 million in Sept. 11 aid from New York, which had fought to keep the money to treat sick and injured ground zero workers, lawmakers said Tuesday.

Bush Urges China to Grant More Freedoms

US freedoms are granted by congress

KYOTO, Japan -- President Bush prodded China on Wednesday to grant more political freedom to its 1.3 billion people and held up rival Taiwan as an example of a society that has successfully moved from repression to democracy.

NTSB: Runway Safety Needs Improvement

eyeballs not considered

WASHINGTON -- Airline pilots need better warning systems to avoid collisions at increasingly crowded airports, federal accident investigators said Tuesday in announcing transportation safety priorities.

Court: Indian Money Accounting Impossible

judge bribed with shiny beads and trinkets

WASHINGTON -- A federal appeals court decided Tuesday that it was unreasonable to require a detailed historical accounting of money the government has been managing for American Indians, saying the bookkeeping chore would "take 200 years."

Report: Ex-Broadcasting Chairman Broke Law

that'll work

The corporation _ which funnels hundreds of millions of federal dollars to National Public Radio, the Public Broadcasting Service and noncommercial radio and television stations _ was created by Congress in the late 1960s to shield public broadcasting from political influence.

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Women May Enjoy Humor More, if It's Funny

``while'' ha ha

Reiss' team studied the response of 10 women and 10 men to 70 black-and-while cartoons, asking them to rate the jokes for how funny they were.

Man Charged With Killing Alleged Attacker

the judy garland defense

PHILADELPHIA -- A young man was charged with stabbing to death one of four teenagers who allegedly attacked him and taunted him because he is gay.

Man Killed Walking Home After Party

killed by a deer would be a better story

SULTAN, Wash. -- A man walking home after his 55th birthday party because friends and family believed he was too drunk to drive was struck and killed by another vehicle, police said.

Doubts Raised About Toilet-Seat Case

superglue accidents come in threes

DENVER -- A man who sued Home Depot last month claiming a prank left him glued to a toilet seat made a similar allegation about another restroom more than a year ago, an official told a newspaper.

Bush aides sent to ethics classes

good trick for ethics classes your business sends you to :

immediately raise your hand and ask if it's ever okay to tell a lie.

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - President George W. Bush's chief of staff Andrew Card and other top White House officials started attending classes on ethics and the handling of classified information on Tuesday in response to the indictment of a top aide in the CIA leak investigation.

GOP Lawmakers Voice Qualms About Flu Plan

qualms and a fever. get lots of rest. it will go away in five days.

WASHINGTON -- President Bush's proposal to spend $7.1 billion for flu pandemic preparedness could run into problems in the House, where some Democrats contend it shortchanges states and some Republicans say it's too expensive.

Oregon Foursome Claims $340M in Lottery

dollar a year for 340M years

They arrived at lottery headquarters to have the ticket verified and decide whether they wanted the money in an after-tax lump sum of $110 million, or 30 annual installments of about $7.6 million.

FCC Clarifies VoIP Disconnection Deadline

not thought through completely

The Federal Communications Commission won't require Internet phone service providers to cut off customers who don't have reliable 911 emergency call service.

Urbina Arrested in Attempted Murder Case

switch to ice hockey

"This, of course, can in some way hurt his career as a professional ballplayer, and all will depend on the way in which he is brought before justice," defense lawyer Jose Luis Tamayo said.

Another Lawyer in Saddam Trial Gunned Down

like everyone else, i say ``good'' when i hear a lawyer was gunned down.

the only thing better is a reporter gunned down.

stories that make your day.

i imagine they can try hussein just fine without reporters who are trying to sell their overhyped hysterical stories to the jaded soap opera audience, the only audience they can hold.

Gunmen in a speeding car killed a defense lawyer in the Saddam Hussein trial and wounded another Tuesday, raising doubts about whether the prosecution of the ousted leader can proceed amid the insurgency and domestic turmoil.

Poll: Libby Indictment Hits Major Nerve

dental hygiene allegory

there is no nerve that was struck. it's a figure of speech. the story is about a figure of speech.

The recent indictment of Vice President Cheney's top aide has struck a nerve with the American public.

Today's Voting Could Be Test for GOP

no-story story.

could-be news, a division of braces-news, a division of looms-news

Voters in New Jersey and Virginia picked governors Tuesday after high- spending, mean-spirited campaigns that were closely watched by political analysts for signs of the public's mood ahead of next year's midterm elections.

France Braces for 13th Night of Violence

all the news that isn't news yet.

bracing-news, a division of looms-news.

President Jacques Chirac declared a 12-day state of emergency Tuesday, paving the way for curfews to be imposed on riot-hit cities and towns in an extraordinary measure to halt France's worst civil unrest in nearly four decades.

Pentagon: Detainees Must Be Treated Well

no!! please! anything but the doggie torture!

Thrown on the defensive by abuse of prisoners in Iraq and Guantanamo Bay, the Pentagon has issued a broad new directive mandating that detainees be treated humanely and has banned the use of dogs to intimidate or harass suspects.

Gonorrhea Rates Fall but Other STDs Rise

had to do with wanting tinkerbell to live.

i, for one did not applaud, but tinkerbell lived anyway.

About 330,000 cases of gonorrhea _ once known as "the clap" _ were reported in 2004.

Three Said Hurt in Tenn. School Shooting

play down three hurt not children.

parents rush etc.

my high school had a rifle range, and competition with other high schools. on any given day, there were students on the bus with rifles, transporting them home or to school, if there was rifle practice. nobody thought anything of it.

what wild west was this? hillside, nj 1959

it wouldn't sell today. hysteria needed to hold audience.

Three administrators were shot and wounded at a high school Tuesday, and a student was arrested, school officials said.

The victims' conditions were not immediately released.

Parents rushed to 1,400-student Campbell County High School to take their children home after the shooting about 30 miles northwest of Knoxville.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Senate OKs Bill That Delays Meat Labeling

what's this hole in my rump steak?

WASHINGTON -- The Senate on Thursday sent a $100 billion food and farm spending bill to President Bush that includes a two-year delay on labels telling grocery shoppers where their meat comes from.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Talks Break Off in Philly Transit Strike

good news for the let-them-all-starve faction

PHILADELPHIA -- With a strike halting most of the city's public transportation for a third day, negotiations between the region's largest transit agency and its workers' union broke off early Wednesday with no sign of progress.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Ancient Burial Ground Discovered in N.Y.

more dead indians

they're all over

"I ... saw little bits of bone down the hillside and some of it had washed away in the surf already," said Richeson, the parks supervisor at Indian Island County Park _ named in honor of the local Shinnecock and other tribes that have inhabited Long Island for as much as 12,000 years.

NYC Mayor Steps Up Criticism of Opponent

self deprecating humor is not big on the campaign circuit this year

NEW YORK -- Mayor Michael Bloomberg went after his Democratic opponent Tuesday in their last debate with the most force he has shown in the race, accusing Fernando Ferrer of offering empty protests and no problem-solving.

Researchers Say Levees Had Design Flaws

hindsight press release affirms need for engineers who issue hindsight press releases

NEW ORLEANS -- The engineers who designed the floodwalls that collapsed during Hurricane Katrina did not fully consider the porousness of the Louisiana soil or make other calculations that would have pointed to the need for stronger levees with deeper pilings and wider bases, researchers say.

Bush Outlines $7.1B Flu-Fighting Strategy

or you can stop its spread by bagging your own groceries

WASHINGTON -- President Bush outlined a $7.1 billion strategy Tuesday to prepare for a possible worldwide super-flu outbreak, aiming to overhaul the vaccine industry so eventually every American could be inoculated within six months of a pandemic's beginning.

Senate Emerges From Closed Session on Iraq

sorry i don't have a clue what's going on, but i am confident that it's meaningless

WASHINGTON -- In a day of political drama, Democrats forced the Republican-controlled Senate into an unusual closed session Tuesday, questioning intelligence that President Bush used in the run-up to the war in Iraq and accusing Republicans of ignoring the issue.

N.J. Gubernatorial Candidates Trade Barbs

coleridge wrote that conflict of interest is the pulley on which good character is hoist into public view.

that was before outrage became a winning political posture.

NEWARK, N.J. -- In a gubernatorial campaign already notorious for its negative ads, Democratic Sen. Jon Corzine and Republican Doug Forrester traded conflict-of-interest allegations in a radio debate Tuesday night.

Defense Wins New Judge in DeLay Case

moonbat judge removed from entertainment scene

AUSTIN, Nov. 1 -- Former House majority leader Tom DeLay (R-Tex.) won an early round in his money-laundering and conspiracy trial Tuesday by getting a judge aligned with Democratic candidates and causes removed from the case.

Trial Begins in R.I. Lead Paint Lawsuit

think of it as a tax

PROVIDENCE, R.I. -- Trial began Tuesday in the state's second attempt to hold former makers of lead-based paint accountable for a product that prosecutors say has sickened children and contaminated hundreds of thousands of homes.

Judge Rules Soldier's Body Stays in Okla.

perfect occasion for a solomon-like decision to split the body, missed

SAN FRANCISCO -- A judge in a bitter dispute between divorced parents over where to bury a son killed in Iraq sided with the soldier's father Tuesday, saying he did not believe the mother's tearful testimony.

Texas Gov. Rick Perry Criticizes FEMA

what's worse than government involvement? two-government involvement.

DALLAS -- Gov. Rick Perry railed against the Federal Emergency Management Agency on Tuesday, saying its inaction is putting tens of thousands of hurricane victims at risk of getting evicted and preventing law enforcement from knowing which of the evacuees are dangerous criminals.

Talks Resume in Philly Transit Strike

everybody is hoping the strike lasts years and the union and all its members die.

PHILADELPHIA -- Negotiations resumed Tuesday night between the region's largest transit agency and its workers' union, the first talks since a strike two days ago halted most public transportation in the city.

Ore. Hospital Settles Class-Action Claim

it's an insurance scam. the idea is to force you to buy insurance by making self-insurance too costly.

PORTLAND, Ore. -- A settlement was reached Tuesday in a closely watched class-action lawsuit filed on behalf of uninsured patients who claim a major nonprofit hospital system overcharged them.

The complaint alleges that Providence Hospital System contradicted its stated mission of providing universal access to health care by charging uninsured patients higher rates for the same services than other patients.

Ex-Pizza Deliveryman Accused of Killing 10

pregnant victims gets the soap opera crowd mad.

LOS ANGELES -- A former pizza deliveryman accused of being one of the city's most prolific serial killers was ordered Tuesday to stand trial on charges of murdering 10 women, two of whom were pregnant.

Colo. Voters Give Up $3.7B in Tax Refunds

how about getting rid of higher education, health care and transportation

Supporters said Colorado simply could not afford to vote no, not with higher education, health care and transportation already suffering from millions of dollars in budget cuts.

Ga. Woman Pleads Guilty to Killing Child

maternal instinct story

ATLANTA -- A woman accused of helping her husband kill their 8-year-old daughter because they believed she was demonic pleaded guilty to murder Tuesday.

Denver Voters Approve Teachers Pay Plan

new plan mysteriously involves more money

DENVER -- Denver became the largest school district in the country to switch to paying teachers based on their students' achievement Tuesday, as voters approved an annual $25 million tax increase to link teacher salaries to test scores and other measurements.


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