``I must give him his due. He has considerably cretinized me.'' Lautréamont

Pics click to enlarge.

Monday, January 30, 2006

Woodruff Found Passion for News in China

the latest national soap opera event unfolds

where are the man-in-the-street interviews where the guy says ``who gives a sh*t?''

like with princess di, the public finds its views are not represented in the media

the media play to a single audience, soap opera women

100,000 people die every day in the world and the nation has to fixate on the cast of ``how the world turns'' because advertisers pay for the eyeballs of dysfunctional women

NEW YORK -- Bob Woodruff had a comfortable career in corporate law ahead of him when he took a year away to teach in China. It was 1989, the year of the Tiananmen Square protest, and amid the chaos, Woodruff discovered his passion for journalism.

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Analysis: Bush to Try to Re-Energize GOP

stupid domestic ideas is not an energizing problem

WASHINGTON -- Beginning the sixth year of his administration, President Bush is finding it harder and harder to rally support from within his own party for major initiatives.

Pelosi Questions Bush's Spying Program

she can do that when she's president

congress doesn't get to say what the president's powers are.

the voters do

WASHINGTON -- House Democratic leader Nancy Pelosi says President Bush should have used his extensive authority under the law to monitor suspected terrorists rather than approve the National Security Agency's disputed monitoring program.

Philippine Children Brush for Record

current record held by britain

MANILA, Philippines -- Nearly 11,000 school children brushed their teeth at a seaside Manila park Sunday in an attempt to break a world record for a simultaneous brush-off and to try and reverse the prevalence of tooth decay among Filipinos, organizers said.

Army Tests Soldiers in Alaskan Extremes

prose eaten by bears and recovered afterwards

DELTA JUNCTION, Alaska -- The Humvee's headlights shone incredibly bright, casting daylight clarity on a line of spruce trees, every needle standing out in stark contrast to the dark night of Alaska's interior.

Lawmakers Push Bush on Abramoff Contacts

bush should tell them all to grow up

WASHINGTON -- Republican lawmakers said Sunday that President Bush should publicly disclose White House contacts with Jack Abramoff, the lobbyist who has pleaded guilty to felony charges in an influence-peddling case.

Police Find 3 Children Dead in Ark. Home

mother snaps

DE QUEEN, Ark. -- Police found the bodies of three children lying side-by-side on a bed in their home Saturday after their mother said she smothered them, investigators said.

Brain Scans May Be Used as Lie Detectors

it won't work on women

CHARLESTON, S.C. -- Picture this: Your boss is threatening to fire you because he thinks you stole company property. He doesn't believe your denials. Your lawyer suggests you deny it one more time _ in a brain scanner that will show you're telling the truth.

Fallen Challenger Astronauts Honored

let's take a moment to remember the challenger jokes that appeared immediately, a sign that the country is not after all a nation of national soap opera addicts

there are still cowboys out there, was the message

CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. -- The twelve children of the Challenger astronauts were toddlers, teenagers or starting careers as pilots when they gathered with family to watch the shuttle launch just a few miles away on a chilly morning they would never forget.

Frist: Gov't Unwanted in End-Of-Life Cases

politician seeking votes

finds opportunists are seen as opportunists

takes opportunity to say something

it's not like he's standing on principle, once again

not a paradox

the stable configuration is that politicians are hated by everybody

WASHINGTON -- Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, who took a leading role in the Terry Schiavo case, said Sunday it taught him that Americans do not want the government involved in such end-of-life decisions.

Man Fatally Shot by Ex-Wife's Grandmother

payback news

LAKE FOREST, Calif. -- A man picking up his young son for a supervised court visit was shot twice at point-blank range by the boy's 81-year-old great-grandmother and died of his injuries, police said.

Weather English

a hierarchy unknown to every thesaurus.

so far, moods are untapped.

it won't, for example, be bleak this morning and dreary this afternoon.

Occasional showers with isolated thunderstorms this morning...then a chance of showers with isolated thunderstorms this afternoon. Breezy with highs in the upper 50s. Southwest winds 15 to 25 mph with gusts up to 50 mph. Chance of rain 100 percent.

Monday, January 23, 2006

Much-Needed Gap Filled

each one is better than the next

Schumer: Well, who knows--but, you know, it's--no one is going to take a back seat to Democrats on fighting a tough war on terror. But what Karl Rove is doing is trying to divert attention.

cite via opinionjournal

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Mother Makes Appeal to Reporter's Captors

set for the grief channel for the entertainment of millions of waiting american women

eyeballs to be sold to advertisers

NEW YORK -- The mother of abducted American reporter Jill Carroll appealed for her daughter's release Thursday, hours before her captors' deadline, saying the 28-year-old is a woman of deep conviction who respects the Iraqi people.

Attacks on Homeless Reported Nationwide

the press release news genre

it will involve more money

From Florida to Alaska, dozens of homeless people are attacked each year, most often by white men under 20, according to the Washington-based National Coalition for the Homeless. Baseball bats are a favored weapon, as well as rocks, bricks, fists and feet, pellet guns and knives.

Governors Object to National Guard Cuts

can money be involved

WASHINGTON -- The National Governors Association urged the Pentagon on Thursday to reconsider its proposal to reduce the number of National Guard combat brigades.

Study: Most College Students Lack Skills

NYT editorials not understood

That means they could not interpret a table about exercise and blood pressure, understand the arguments of newspaper editorials, compare credit card offers with different interest rates and annual fees or summarize results of a survey about parental involvement in school.

'American Taliban' Father Urges Clemency

meddlesome parents were the problem in the first place

SAN FRANCISCO -- After years of silence, the father of American-born Taliban soldier John Walker Lindh said Thursday he has asked President Bush to grant his son clemency, adding that the then teenager never raised arms against the United States.

Top Senate Democrats oppose Alito nomination

nobody listens to the senate anymore

Three top Senate Democrats said on Thursday they would vote against U.S. Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito because they feared he would not provide an effective check on what they described as President George W. Bush's bid for expanded power.

US senators push for sports in family TV packages

more soap

Two U.S. senators on Thursday urged the cable and satellite television industry to address the glaring absence of popular sports channels from new packages of family-oriented programming they plan to offer.

Bush faces battle to regain political clout

story about imaginary things

one imaginary thing is clout, which is a confusion of auctoritas, potestas, officium and imperium, made into something you can acquire, steal, have, and lose

it's called reification

what would political news be without phlogiston, ``the cause of fire''

President George W. Bush is battling eroded public confidence in his leadership over issues like Iraq, the economy and corruption as he seeks to recapture his political clout before November's elections.

Final Report on Cisneros Details Battle

i forget who he was, but it's a coverup and a whitewash, and he's certainly guilty as hell.

The independent counsel who investigated former Housing Secretary Henry Cisneros contended in his final report Thursday that the Justice Department and IRS blocked his efforts to probe possible Cisneros tax violations.

US on bin Laden tape: no negotiations

closed on holidays, another good policy worth citing.

the united states does not negotiate with assholes, would be my policy statement under the circumstances, but nobody elected me.

The United States dismissed on Thursday a conditional truce offered in a tape attributed to Osama bin Laden and said it "does not negotiate with terrorists."

Deal Reached on Mexican Cement Imports

blow to illicit cement trade

hollowed-out lawn jockey prices slashed

WASHINGTON -- Much more Mexican cement will be allowed into the United States under an agreement in principle announced by the Bush administration Thursday.

Gonzales makes legal case for domestic spying

wrong argument

it's constitutional, not legal. the status of any law is exactly the question, when it limits the president.

the area is murky and should be left murky, so it falls to the voters to decide, every four years.

otherwise people will game the system that's inevitably set up in making it definite.

if the president were gathering FBI files on political enemies or setting the IRS on them, that would be an easy call. but he's doing what most people think needs to be done, namely checking out what men of middle eastern appearance are up to.

The U.S. Justice Department, facing lawsuits and congressional hearings on President George W. Bush's domestic eavesdropping program, sought on Thursday to persuade congressional leaders the surveillance was lawful and did not violate civil liberties.

Man Dies After Dog Falls on Car in Mich.

over a decade ago, also in michigan, a dog fell on a motorcyclist, killing him

it rains cats and dogs up there

LIVONIA, Mich. -- A dog apparently fell from a freeway overpass and crashed through a car windshield, fatally injuring the driver, police said Thursday.

Friday, January 13, 2006

Jonah Goldberg

wrong closing.

the deal is, that to work a decent chaos on america, you need lots of organization; but the bigger an organization, the greater the chance of detection.

once the terrorists are hunted and pursued enough around the world so that they must organize in small elements to survive, they can no longer work decent amounts of chaos, and the war is over.

this domestic spying is part of keeping the ``maximum survival size'' _smaller_ than the ``minimum chaos-working size,'' and that's the key to everything.

well before an organization grows big enough to do something worthwhile doing, it is detected.

it's not that ``terrorists are after _you_'' but that ``we are after _them_.''

it's almost as if somebody wants something big to happen, not in a way that makes them responsible, but in some way that makes sure america loses.

But, to keep the frenzy alive, we talk about spying on "certain Americans" - when in reality we're trying to stop barbarians from killing "certain Americans."

Sunday, January 08, 2006

N.Y. Times Editor-Reporter Dies After Attack in NW

must have been liberal

"David was one of the most accomplished journalists of his generation in Washington," Taubman said last night.

"He could do anything, and he did so many things brilliantly," Taubman said. "He was an all-time great, versatile reporter who could tackle any subject" and wrote about the most abstruse matters, particularly in financial areas, with "remarkable lucidity, speed" and sophistication.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Some Say Media Erred in Mine Coverage

some say the story is picked for soap opera value and don't care whether it's right or wrong, because it's a stupid story in the first place.

it caters to women, who like roller coaster emotions

but they don't like having their roller coasters trifled with

hence the media problem. how to avoid alienating their soap opera audience

each day, 10,000 americans (round numbers) die.

each one is important so somebody, but different somebodies for different people.

those somebodies get support from women around them, in their neighborhood, because the women are interested, while the men do the necessary digging.

a division of labor working the way it should, support and the technical details, in the neighborhood.

soap opera is parasitic on that virtue of women, hooking the interest in support but in support of nothing at all.

it's porn for women.

they're then sympathetic where their sympathy does no good for anybody, except entertaining themselves.

this is a solid audience and the media sells it.

hence the miner story.

hence the need for the media to deal with angry soap opera women

men in the meantime left the media target demographic years ago and don't care.

except, like porn, it becomes a problem when it takes over all the terrain.

all the nations news is edited by its soap opera target audience, which makes a serious public debate on anything impossible.

thanks to soap opera porn.

The answer, like the story itself, is murky.

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Second Turkish child dies from bird flu

car travel game : what countries are named after poultry

ISTANBUL (Reuters) - A second Turkish child from the same family died from bird flu on Thursday at a hospital in eastern Turkey where she was being treated, a regional governor said.

Monday, January 02, 2006

Kerry Positioned for '08 White House Bid

fundraising prowess is the feminine form of rich spouse

his own prow wouldn't raise anything

he's operating on capital infusions

He has also used his fundraising prowess to aid Democrats across the country, collecting chits that could be called if he seeks the party's White House nomination.

Crowds Endure Rain to Watch Rose Parade

what it means is that reporters are assigned to the thing and are not free to go home

grabbing an off chance that the story won't seem too ridiculous to read

it's beyond their control

like NORAD tracking santa

PASADENA, Calif. -- A steady rain fell as the Rose Parade got under way Monday, forcing the Rose Queen to don a poncho.

Explosion at W.Va. Coal Mine Traps 13

will it make tv breaking news 24/7 coverage, is the question.

reporters and crews rushed to the scene for the same pointless on the scene coverage

thoughts of loved ones shared, women swoon

i'd guess it will

TALLMANSVILLE, W.Va. -- A coal mine explosion that may have been sparked by lightning trapped 13 miners more than a mile underground Monday, state officials said.

Small Plane Crashes in Hudson River

told you so below

YONKERS, N.Y. -- Two people were pulled from the Hudson River on Monday after their single engine plane crashed off the shore of Yonkers, police said.

Top judge worried about court violence, pay gap

it happens every time

why lifetime appointments are a bad idea

comfort of judges is foremost

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - In his first year-end report on the federal judiciary, U.S. Chief Justice John Roberts on Sunday called for better court security to prevent violence and higher salaries to keep a diverse mix of judges on the bench.

Schumer Seeks Motive in U.S. Spy Probe

reporter does not include damaging bush among the choices.

why not.

damaging bush is worth american lives to one party.

the war doesn't figure in at all, in the motive.

WASHINGTON -- The investigation into leaks about a domestic spying program should determine whether the motivation was damaging security or revealing a potentially illegal activity, a Democrat on the Senate Judiciary Committee said Sunday.

U.S. Rings in 2006 With Parties, Fireworks

actually most people didn't do anything because they don't have to write a story about it

some went to bed early

awoke to fake celebration reports

wondered how much longer this reporting crap will go on

LAS VEGAS -- Fireworks rained over the Las Vegas Strip as hundreds of thousands of revelers rang in 2006 with quickie weddings, parties at posh nightclubs and what organizers hoped was the world's largest simultaneous toast _ 14,000 Chardonnay-filled plastic glasses raised just before midnight.

Bush Awards 9 Purple Hearts to U.S. Troops

tripe used when actual words would do fine

you don't get honored for dying or getting wounded. you get honored for being called and going.

sometimes that has consequences

the people who cared are the ones who went when called, all of them

"This hospital is full of healers and compassionate people that care deeply about our men and women in uniform," the president said after his visit with the wounded troops. "It's also full of courageous young soldiers and marines, airmen. I'm just overwhelmed by the great strength of character of not only those who have been wounded but of their loved ones as well. "

Big Easy Residents Hope for Better 2006

surfeit of reporters in new orleans brings hopes across america for their immediate destruction

zeta seems to be too far away

soap opera will continue until some even more worthless news eclipses it

NEW ORLEANS -- Dr. Jeffrey Coco, his wife and their three children returned to New Orleans especially for a New Year's Eve party held at a neighbor's house that did not flood in the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina.

Bush defends eavesdropping amid calls for testimony

news hypes story amid audience dismissal

SAN ANTONIO, Texas (Reuters) - President George W. Bush defended domestic eavesdropping by the National Security Agency on Sunday after a newspaper report about a Justice Department official's resistance to the program prompted new calls for a Senate inquiry.

Experts: Roberts, Alito Side With Business

``business'' is everybody except academics and business experts

WASHINGTON -- Business couldn't do any better than Chief Justice John Roberts and Samuel Alito on the Supreme Court. The prospect of the two on the Supreme Court signals to manufacturers and businesses that they will have allies in high places, say academics and business experts.

Schuller's Son to Run Crystal Cathedral

no pastor's daughter effect when it's a rich pastor

Robert H. Schuller, head of the famed all-glass church southeast of Los Angeles, told his congregation Sunday that his son, Robert A. Schuller, will succeed him.

2 Snowmobilers Killed in Colo. Avalanche

avalanche, fire, tornado, flood, wind, shark

have i forgotten anything that has an automatic news handle and its own template

small plane lands not on runway, in its various forms, i guess

FORT COLLINS, Colo. -- A New Year's Day avalanche killed two men who were snowmobiling near Rocky Mountain National Park, and a snowshoer was missing and presumed dead after another avalanche in Utah, officials said.

Big Easy Aquarium Restocking After Katrina

pets, diets, and space aliens are the big 3 when you're out of material

NEW ORLEANS -- It's lunchtime and Elvira and Nick are having a quick bite, then it's back to an afternoon of swimming in their big glass house on the Mississippi River.

Rose Parade May Get Rare Rain Storm

dry season and rain-on-parade news

the suspense is terrible ! even though it hadn't occured to anybody that it would be suspense before this.

it would be reaching to mention the asteroid-hit menace, but one hasn't hit the rose parade ever. if the rain doesn't work out.

PASADENA, Calif. -- It hasn't rained on the Rose Parade since 1955, but organizers were prepared in case that half-century run of luck washed away Monday with the storms that have been pelting the state.

Doctors Debate Safety of Obesity Surgeries

eat less, you fat cow, news for our women readers

safety does not exist and does not come up in ordinary speech at all

it's always part of a commercial

-- As more people abandon New Year's resolutions to lose weight and turn to obesity surgery, doctors are debating which type is safest and best.

U.S. Says It's Making Progress on Bird Flu

orwell's inversion, the confusion of input and output

you conquer bird flu when you conquer bird flu

WASHINGTON -- The U.S. is making fast progress in preparations for a bird flu pandemic, including measures to close down schools and quarantine the sick, but vaccine supplies remain inadequate, health officials said Sunday.

Citizens: Nothing Odd About Normal, Ill.

reporter desperation shown by cataphoric pronoun reference

in brings out word processor hum

NORMAL, Ill. -- When he's traveling on city business, Mayor Chris Koos carries around a $50 or $100 bill that he'll hand to anyone who comes up with a joke he hasn't heard about his central Illinois town where "Welcome to Normal" signs are about geography, not a state of mind.

Rovers Still Exploring Mars After 2 Years

press release reworked by reporter

bottom line : nasa wants your money

the issue of pointlessness not raised

The rock-climbing Spirit went down in the history books by becoming the first robot to scale an extraterrestrial hill. Last summer, it completed a daredevil climb to the summit of Husband Hill _ as tall as the Statue of Liberty _ despite fears that it might not survive the weather.

Bush Opens '06 With Focus on Economy, Iraq

he could start by prosecuting them for treason

bush's business isn't selling audience to advertisers

CRAWFORD, Texas -- President Bush is starting his sixth year in office with a flurry of activity designed to trumpet upturns in the economy, defend U.S. action in Iraq and challenge critics who claim his methods of fighting terrorists infringe on civil liberties.

Tropical Storm Zeta Drifts Across Atlantic

do reporters even read their own stuff?

what's it going to do, not weaken eventually?

template-force trumps sense

it's like a poet going for a rhyme at the cost of nonsense

MIAMI -- Tropical Storm Zeta, the 27th named storm of a record-breaking hurricane season, maintained its strength as it drifted across the Atlantic on Sunday, but forecasters expected it to eventually weaken.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

NYC Mayor Bloomberg Sworn in for 2nd Term

he didn't pledge it, he said it

what he pledged was to uphold the constitution

probably in contradition

NEW YORK -- Mayor Michael Bloomberg pledged to continue the city's progress, including lower crime and a healthier economy, as he was sworn in for another four years on Sunday.

Gunman Robs Md. Churchgoers During Service

good samaritan robbed on highway news

it's not a disaster because there's no -ing participles

BALTIMORE -- A gunman burst into a church service Sunday evening and robbed several members of the congregation, authorities said.

Florida Teen Home After Iraq Adventure

parent relief story

this can happen to your child

assuming he is not abducted first by child abductors

no more staying outside until dinner with other kids

MIAMI -- A 16-year-old who took off to Iraq alone to experience the lives of its people firsthand arrived back in Florida on Sunday, ending a three-week Middle East odyssey _ much to the relief of his parents.

Bush Calls Domestic Spy Program 'Limited'

reporter's audience trumps country

SAN ANTONIO -- President Bush strongly defended his domestic spying program on Sunday, calling it legal as well as vital to thwarting terrorist attacks, and contended the leak making it public had caused "great harm to the nation."

Fires Ravage Oklahoma City, Texas Towns

past tense followed by -ing participles for color, is the template for disaster crap

the story is produced with one thing in mind : how many eyeballs can we get to read this

advertisers buy eyeballs

if you want men, crash photos page 4 does it, but it turns off a larger audience, women

women : this can happen to your house !

a fairly large number of houses don't burn up every year, a statistic omitted. probably yours included. we have to send reporters to find even these.

in general : the flavor of moral disgust with news comes from making somebody's problems into entertainment, trading on it ; which happens to coincide with soap opera.

women's interest in complex relationships, soul-searching and eternal frustration is helpful in their own neighborhoods, where it may do some good ; parasitic on that virtue is the virtual neighborhood of any-disaster-anywhere-brought-to-you-for-engrossment, where it does no good at all except to entertain the woman herself.

These women now edit the mainstream news by their preferences, being the biggest bloc of audience available

how to fight this? somehow make the calculation of audience obvious to the audience.

OKLAHOMA CITY -- Grassfires raged across the dry southern prairie Sunday, burning homes in Oklahoma City, destroying two small towns in Texas, and creating patchworks of flames as burning embers were blown by the gusting winds.

Second Major Storm Washes Across Calif.

see also avalanche, fire and shark for breaking news fallbacks when nothing is happening

editor staring at empty column inches news

GUERNEVILLE, Calif. -- The second major storm in two days washed across Northern California on Sunday, prolonging the threat of flooding as residents began cleaning up the mud and debris left behind by the first wave of floodwater.

Victims' Families to Confront Killer Nurse

TV to be no better in the new year than the old

women rule the airwaves and edit every national debate

audience is the name of the game

NEWARK, N.J. -- This could be the week that Marie Romero finally gets to look Charles Cullen straight in the eye and tell the former nurse and admitted serial killer how much pain he caused by killing her sister.


Blog Archive